College Prep: 101

College Prep: 101

Written by Kevin Hamor, PsyD

Syllabus Week 
We have probably all seen the movies about how fun college can be, right? Elle Woods is crushing it in the courtroom in all pink, a group of women sing throughout college, and it is aca-mazing. However, college is not all Hollywood chalked it up to be. Whether you are attending college far from home or up the street, it is a very different experience from high school. No one is making sure you eat vegetables, go to bed before midnight, or do your homework. More often than not, there may be some challenges you experience that make you feel alone and unsupported, and even overwhelmed with all the responsibilities asked of you as a college student. Some of these challenges include dealing with roommates, difficult professors, and struggling to stay focused on studying. In this “course,” you will be presented with strategies to feel more supported, welcomed, and excited to be a college student.

Week of Welcome
Having the opportunity to have a roommate in college can be exciting: meeting a new person, doing new things together, and maybe even forming a new friendship. However, it can be a significant stressor to navigate interpersonal relational dynamics with a roommate. From my experience working with college students in a university setting for three years, challenges with roommates seem never-ending. I have heard of issues ranging from cleanliness and loud music to having a roommate move their partner in, indefinitely. The best way to navigate these challenges is to be communicative and not avoidant, as avoiding confrontation or communication will only worsen the problem(s) over time.

According to Illinois State University’s (ISU) Housing Services (2025), the best way to have an enjoyable experience navigating living dynamics with a roommate is to connect, compromise, care, and resolve conflicts. They encourage you to ask open-ended questions pertaining to rules, needs, and wishes that you both can agree upon. These can range from shared belongings, noise, and privacy needs. That then leads to communication, in which ISU encourages open communication, cooperation, collaboration, and respect, to name a few. They suggest you be honest about your safety and comfort, and also hold empathy for compromise and negotiation. That begins the third step, compromise. Boundaries change just as your needs and wants change as you grow at college. That means what worked during the beginning of the semester, as you first began school, may be different as you start the next semester. ISU then encourages you and your roommate to use care by demonstrating empathy. Lastly, the next piece of advice is to utilize care when interacting with your roommate(s). Highlighting the importance of care when managing conflict can go a long way to reinforce connection, communication, and compromise (Illinois State University, 2025).

Homecoming
A quick Google search on “adapting to college life” will show results ranging from limiting substance use to focusing on hygiene and routine building. What might be more helpful is first figuring out what challenges you are having in adjusting to college. Is it living far away from my family? Is it challenging for me to make friends? Or is it difficult to perform well academically? It may be a little bit of all of the above. Regardless, the first semester or even year of college can feel out-of-body during one period, and liberating and joyous in the other. That is because you are most likely experiencing many new things all at the same time. According to a researcher and professor, Dr. Vincent Tinto, studied the retention and departure of college students and found many compounding factors that led to a student dropping out of college. He theorized that, when students’ values and lived experiences, to name a few, are integrated in an accepting or positive manner, students are more likely to stay enrolled in their prospective school. However, a misalignment in that blend can contribute to student dropout and not feeling connected to or accepted by their prospective school. These connections can be dependent on the quality of resources provided on campus, as well as the quality of professors. Some helpful questions to ask yourself are: Do you, as a student, feel accepted by your peers and professors, and what is the quality and effectiveness of your peer-to-peer relationships outside of the classroom (Tinto, 1975).

Many universities and colleges advertise events for students to participate in to be more involved on campus. This may help strengthen your connectedness with the school as a whole, as well as increase your social support. Most schools also offer events that are free of charge and held weekly to monthly to more easily incorporate in your academic schedule.

Mid-Terms & Finals Week
As many of you are beginning to realize, grades are weighted differently in college and university than in high school. Some of your classes may only have three to four assignments for the whole course, while others may have 20 or more assignments and weekly discussion posts. Regardless, how you approach each course is probably different. Below are some helpful tips that ensure you are doing your best to succeed academically.

The general rule-of-thumb is for every credit a course is worth, you need to spend two to three hours per week studying and preparing for that course. If you are enrolled in 15 credits, that is over thirty hours a week. Now you may have already found out that some courses will require the full 3 hours a week of study and coursework, while others are a lot simpler.

One of the best ways to assist you in preparing for your courses is to get and stay organized. I am not saying you need to have everything color-coded and use five different highlighters, but having a general sense of what assignments are due, when exams are, and other major components of your courses can make a huge difference in your preparedness and overall stress. That leads me to time management. Knowing when your classes are and also showing up to them helps demonstrate to the professor that you are invested. Also, you cannot learn the material if you are not in class. You would not believe how many times a professor may say, “This specific thing will be on the exam,” and you would not have known if you were not there. Next, get to know your professor. Most, if not all, professors are required to offer some sort of office hours, and if they are truly passionate about what they teach, they may provide more individualized support. Lastly, study more effectively. What worked in high school may not work for you in college, and as mentioned above, you may need to approach how you study for each course differently, too.

Studying habits are important to form early and well when you first begin a course and semester. In college, you are most likely attending any given course once or twice a week, so if you are not reviewing any of the material in between, you are more likely to not remember it and do poorly on the exams. Setting aside a set time in your schedule dedicated to studying preemptively may be helpful so that, if you need less time, it will be easier to accommodate, rather than trying to find more time that is no longer available. In addition to setting time in your schedule to study, spacing out when you study can be helpful, too. This method is called distributed practice and helps you remember the material better (Newport, 2007).

Holiday Break
The semester is finally over! As you reflect on your first semester, do not be too discouraged if you did not do your best. Regardless of whether it is your first semester or your 8th semester, college is hard, and no two classes are the same. If you need support as you navigate college, we here at OakHeart are more than happy and equipped to help you succeed. Specifically, I recommend you reach out to get support if you are struggling with implementing organization strategies, struggling to concentrate, struggling socially, struggling with academic performance due to mental health challenges (or any of the above difficulties), or struggling with overall adjustment to the new trials and tribulations you are encountering. We are here to assist you using a variety of evidence-based strategies, including therapies called Cognitive Behavioral Therapy and Acceptance and Commitment Therapy. In such treatments provided at OakHeart Center for Counseling, we can help you with challenging thinking, assisting with organization strategies, increasing values-driven behavior, modifying coping skills, and assisting with interpersonal challenges.

​If you are interested in counseling with Dr. Hamor or any other clinician at OakHeart, call OakHeart at 630-570-0050 or 779-201-6440 or email us at [email protected]. We have counselors, psychologists, and social workers available to help you at one of our locations in North Aurora, IL, Sycamore, IL, and/or via Telehealth Online Therapy Services serving Kane County, DeKalb County, Dupage County, and beyond.

References
Illinois State University (2025). Navigating roommate relationships. University Housing Services. https://housing.illinoisstate.edu/student-life/roommates/relationships/index.php

Newport, C. (2006). How to become a straight-A student: The unconventional strategies real college students use to score high while studying less. Three Rivers Press.

Tinto, V. (1975). Dropout from higher education: A theoretical synthesis of recent research. Review of Educational Research, 45(1), 89-125.